If you’re a dad to-be (DTB), heading into a magical season of parenting and have NO CLUE what to expect or how to navigate this, you’re going to be okay! What I’ve learned from my journey as former DTB, is that it can be overwhelming to navigate the immense journey to dad-hood without some direction. However, as a point of consolation, no future dad ever scored 100% on this journey. My hope is that this piece gives you a glimpse of what’s ahead, so you can predict your next move on your journey to be the ultimate Dad.
As a DTB, trimesters of a pregnancy are not only indicators about your baby’s development, but can be used as major indicators of how to navigate your role with your partner.
In the 1st trimester, the level of hormones that ebbs and flows through baby-mama’s body could have her responding differently to an exact same situation, depending on the day! Nausea is also a big frequent thing in the 1st trimester; so as the DTB, get ready to play Detective to find her nausea triggers and reduce or eliminate them from the immediate area. Also, investigate diet plans and foods that don’t create discomfort in baby-mama’s body as it tries to balance itself off. The 1st trimester is where you also do a bit of researching into birthing options and vitamins that baby-mama may be interested in.
In the 2nd trimester, as DTB, Architect is your role, and coordination is your goal.
The 2nd trimester is said to be the easiest and safest of the 3 trimesters of pregnancy for baby-mama. This is the space for the coordination of all the little celebrations like baby announcements (around 13 weeks), and gender reveals (around 25 weeks). This trimester is a also a great time to strategise an intimate little vacay for the two of you, should baby-mama be up to it!
From a personal admin perspective, the early parts of 2nd trimester are where you also let your place of employment understand that your partner is pregnant, so you can discuss with them the leave options you have for when baby arrives.
The 3rd Trimester is where baby-mama starts to feel heavy as baby grows significantly! This means she will need to take more breaks and rest, as she gracefully endures the extra person attached to her.
In this part of the pregnancy, as a DTB, you’re the Clutch. As clutch, your job is simply to lessen her load. This means carrying extra physical chores and giving more massages or foot rubs. Ob/Gyn visits become more frequent in this trimester as well, so make sure to notify your place of employment of your scheduled appointments.
Most importantly, you need to be prepping for Labour Day. Be sure to aid in prepping hospital bags for you and baby-mama and check in with the hospital for the availability of private rooms if that is your preferred choice for delivery.
On the Big Day, our role is Coach. As coach, you have to encourage and support baby-mama and keep her focus on the prize. Your role also involves speaking up for her, reinforcing her boundaries and creating the ideal environment for her to cross the finish line! After all this, there’s only 1 role left to fill – and that would be Dad. As dads, all we can do is to be present and helpful, by helping baby mama heal to her original self and helping baby grow into their original self.
No matter where you are on your journey – I trust this helps you maintain smooth sailing!
Guest Editor’s Note